What’s not working?

This journey has not been without benefits.

But centrally, at the core, something is not working.

That something is me. I’m not making this thing happen.


There is still a story, deep down inside, a rehearsed and well-trodden path, that I am allowing to color my perceptions.

Every day, when you feel “tired” and “unmotivated”, what is the filter you’re listening through?

When “it doesn’t matter”, and “It won’t make a difference anyway”, what is your filter?

Are you defeated before you start?

Who are you when you are this way?

How much of that bleeds into your interactions?

What are you saying to the people you meet? What are you putting out into the world when you’re in that mode?

The deep inner work is the work. Who I am being, who I am consistently, is what makes the biggest difference in my days.

After that, it is the direction I choose, and what I aim at.

But when coming from this weak position, what do I expect my results to be?

I could have many great opportunities, but when I let myself be in this state of mind, I would just look at them with tired eyes, and a weak heart.

Faith and hope are what’s needed. I hesitate to use those words because I hate bungling up theology and life in a confused way.

But it’s true. I must believe that something can and will happen, that it might happen, if I am to have the courage and perseverance necessary to keep going even when there’s no initial evidence that anything will ever work.

You have to start over every day.

Just get back on the path.






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