Nothing Worked Today

I got some great feedback from my semi-checked-out about-to-leave colleague, who does not appreciate me challenging his cynicism directly.

Basically, stop being pushy with the advice. I think this is likely good advice, and I am taking it at face value, even though I find this particular coworker to be someone in tons of need of advice at the moment.

But – if somebody doesn’t want it, maybe the right thing is to let them go on their merry way.

I tried to explain to my wife that my problem is I want to get everybody to get to this next level of awareness I found, and that’s dumb. She sort of pointed out that maybe if I need everybody to get to that next level, I don’t have it. And while I tried to re-iterate what I meant, the feedback got more and more… direct. And at some point, it’s like “yes, I am saying I’m an idiot, and I didn’t need it to be quite so explicit”.

My coaching call didn’t quite hit the mark for me. I feel still confused and tired. I am not re-energized.

Basically, the whole day was a bit off.

I did rally and get my commitments done, and then I did some dishes (love you babe) because sick kid + sick wife means things are a bit behind. And now I am blogging because I didn’t yesterday and I don’t want to miss two in a row.

How do I want to process this s***pile of a day?

It was good. I found out I am an arrogant jerk, and that I need to calm down. I can work with that. Coaching isn’t going to solve my problems. I am. (And actually, more accurately, I am through the power of Christ, with whom all things are possible, and without whom I am a dunce).

All good lessons. All material for growth.

I kept my 2 commitments after all. I did stay up late. And now I kept my commitment to writing today.